Have you ever been so comfortable in a chair that you have fallen asleep? I mean chairs are not for sleeping but for sitting yet, in the right chair you can become so relaxed that you drift away. Not to mention if you are exhausted. As soon as your butt hits the cushion you can be a goner.
Now the question of will you be able to stay asleep in the comfy chair depends on what type of family you have. Some would urge you to go to your bed and some would allow you to sleep there. And yet some would compromise and allow you to stay asleep only if you had been working really hard and they knew how beat you were.
Now for a moment imagine that chair was a relationship? Comfort in a relationship is not a bad thing. Being comfortable enough to relax, cry, speak your mind, and pass gas is great! After so many years you gain a deeper intimacy and all the bells and whistles that were needed to prove your feelings are not needed as much, or so you think.
Ok so the relationship is being slept on because of the comfort one feels in it and usually the person who is that tired really doesn’t see it as a big deal. Almost gets irritated that anyone would bring it up, yeah that they are sleeping in the wrong place.
When this happens in friendships people just pack up and leave, sometimes without words and sometimes after many attempts to wake the person up and begging them to stop sleeping and being so comfortable. But what happens when the comfy sleeping is in a marriage? Marriage is supposed to be for life, so packing up and rolling out on the sleeper isn’t the solution. And the longer you stay with someone, the harder it is to leave.
“So babe, you need to wake up.”
“Oh shucks, ok, I’m sorry. I’m waking up now.”
A few months or years (in some cases weeks) go by and they become comfortable again, I guess assuming that after being awake for a certain period of time they deserve their rest where ever they want it.
“Hunny I really hate to bother you with this, but you are doing it again.”
Now this can be interpreted as another warning, nagging, nit-picking, or a few other things. Sometimes people will just expect you to wake up on your own after they have already brought it to your attention once. So the question becomes now what? Your mate has become so comfortable in your marriage that they no longer make regular deposits into your love bank. And when they do, it’s only enough to keep the account open (they relationship going) but not enough to make any withdraws. That’s why when they come to you and want something, you go off and spit their card back out to them sending a message that the funds are not available. EMPTY.