Off to dinner you go with your co-worker. No matter how much you try to convince yourself that it’s not a date and that it’s only dinner, your  conscience knows you are telling lies. You lie because you want to avoid the guilt and shame that your heart will feel if you fully embrace the truth.

Now here you are out on a date with a person you find very attractive and have romantic feelings for. You are going over in your mind what you would say if someone you know sees you and also preparing what you’ll explain if need be when you go home. Then you say to yourself, “He’s so disconnected to me he probably won’t even ask!” That makes you even more mad and you decide you NEED THIS. You need to take care of yourself and do things to make you happy if he won’t.


Days drift on by and your feelings seem to grow more and more. You refuse to act on most of your feelings because you are a Christian Woman and that would just be wrong. In all of my years of being single, being in relationships, and being married, I have never been able to control my feelings; but what I have been able to control was my actions and behaviors. Have I always felt strong romantic feelings for my husband, no. Have I always only wanted to be with him and only him, no. But acting on feelings would have cost me everything.  I believe that whatever is done in the dark, always comes into the night. It really does. The vows that I made to God have protected me, my husband, and my marriage. There are so many times when my husband has said “It’s over” because of my actions (you’ll hear more about that when we write our book later this year) and so many times I did things that could be considered unforgivable. Following your feelings when they are leading you into a sinful situation is deadly, because sin leads to death. Maybe not the death of you in the moment, but death of something.

Romans 6:23For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

There are plenty of things that you can do to avoid having intense inappropriate feelings for someone, and many ways that you can prevent an affair. I’ll share those things with you in my next blog, so please come back and most of all please subscribe! Thank you for reading.